I guess.

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Life is…
Fine now.
I guess.
Or maybe not…
A mess.
Maybe it is.

In all this bliss,
There are still parts of you
that have gone amiss.
And my heart is cold.
So is my skin.
And dry…
My hands and lips and my eyes…

Not a single drop of tears to shed.
Empty and dead inside.
No feelings in there.
Nowhere.
I can’t find them.
There’s just an empty void.
Dark and dull… no sense of joy.
Or even sadness.

Just a blanket
Of vacant thoughts
That I think at night.
But they make no sense when I wake up.

And my mornings are empty too.
Restless.
And anxious.
Empty and pointless.
No sense of purpose.
No motives.
Or incentives.
Only me and daily routines.
Repetitive.
Like my sentences.

Goes on and on…
And on…
And then?
What?
Nothing.
I hope you’re well.
That’s all I hope for.
Don’t wish to see you again,
But I’d like to know you’re well.

‘Cause even though I’ve pushed you out of my life,
You’ve still managed to survive in my prayers alive.

Be good.
And well.
And remain that way…
A stranger…
But a beautiful dream as well.
For someone else.
Not me anymore,
I’ve learnt to love myself again…

Today I finally suffice myself.

 – Hiba.

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23 thoughts on “I guess.

  1. Beautiful poem. The end is full of hope. Sometimes, people can really make us think we are worthless without them but when we realize we don’t need anuybody to feel complete, a new life begins 😉
    At least I used to think like that before I marry because now I would feel incomplete without my husband haha

    1. Well I think a husband wife relationship is supposed to be like that. It’s one of the greatest signs of God. You were meant to be in pairs. You’ll be incomplete without the other. 🙂

    1. I knew it when i was writing the comment same as i knew about Missouri incident one and half year ago when i wrote an assignment on american civil war lol
      Its just that i like it when u talk to me in this way.

  2. That’s the difficult part, isn’t it? Learning to love yourself again. It’s hard because it seems impossible as your best self often leaves with the person you loved.
    Beautiful poem, Hiba. Dil ko chhoo gayi.

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