Category: Non fiction

4th July 2017. When it finally hit me.

Find your home

in a person 

and you will be

homeless

in no time.

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Rain

rain.jpg

I’m trying
I’m too invested in things more beautiful than poetry
So I’m trying
I’m getting requests to continue
And I don’t wanna refuse
I know the magic words can do
So I wanna continue
But about what
And where do I start
And how

The weather’s nice
It rained today
Like the tears that I shed yesterday

But the rain is mercy
Unlike my pain
So I know I’ve healed
I felt happy
And excited

And I took my parrot out to the balcony
And he screeched and sang from excitement
And that was my heart.
Happy and joyful
Dancing inside from joy

I don’t get why people use umbrellas during such beautiful weather
It’s ungrateful and idiotic
Especially for people in Kuwait
I can’t believe they could be so dumb
After months of being roasted under the scorching Kuwaiti sun
You’d think people would cherish this beautiful weather

Cool breezes
And drops of sweet water from the heavens
And the weather’s gift to the people of Kuwait
And they have the nerve to be so ungrateful
With umbrellas over their heads
And pacing speedily out from under the sky
So desperate to get inside

How ignorant
They don’t cherish it when they get it
And yet they complain all year round about how much they would love if Kuwait was breezy and cool

We live in a world where people who don’t have time
To cherish and enjoy the things they asked for all year round
What a strange world…

What a strange world…

 – Hiba

16 December 2014

I never did have words before, and I don’t have any now either.

Pakistan is strong and very very resilient. May we be blessed and victorious in our fight against these atrocious crimes of terrorism and cowardice of a kind  that picks on people half their size. Too bad they were underestimating the spirit and the bravery that lives in the hearts of our youth.

May Allah always bless the souls of our martyrs and may He bless this one piece of land that is filled by the people of لآ اِلَهَ اِلّا اللّهُ with His Mercy. May He bless us with the right kinds of knowledge and the wisdom and strength that is required to move forward and prosper as a nation. May we be a successful nation and may we be a nation of good.
.للّهُـمَّ لا مانِعَ لِما أَعْطَـيْت، وَلا مُعْطِـيَ لِما مَنَـعْت، وَلا يَنْفَـعُ ذا الجَـدِّ مِنْـكَ الجَـد

Aameen ya Rabb ul Mu’mineen.

-Hiba

LISTEN!

You know those people that lie to you. And you keep giving them chances. And they keep lying to you. And you keep wondering why they’re lying to you;

Well yeah, let me break it down for you: They are horrible pieces of trash and they give zero damns about you. You are worthless to them and you should be getting rid of them soon.

Get rid of them.

Just get rid of them.

Don’t make me spell it out for you.

Just get rid of them.

– Hiba // Truly, have some respect for yourself and get rid of them.

Kuwait 

Suicide bombing in Kuwait City, Imam Sadiq Mosque.

Who thought kuwait would be just as unsafe. May Allah grant patience to the families of those who have died and may Allah maintain the security of kuwait.

Things I’ve realized in 2014

1. God has His own way of guiding us.

2. Home brewed herbal tea is the best solution for terrible flu. It works like magic.

3. Pakistan feels beautiful at night because of how dark and quiet it gets, where people actually switch off their lights and go to sleep and there is not a single car out at night.

4. Facebook is the name of trouble.

5. Some people never change.

6. Some change, but you never even realize.

7. NIGHT CHANGES is a beautiful beautiful and simply oh so beautiful song.

8. Arguments and debates are different and here is how. Arguments are unhealthy because in those, we’re just trying to cancel each other’s opinion out. Debates though, are healthy because then we are giving each opinion the equal chance to be explained and then we contradict it by fair means to come at conclusions. Arguments never lead to conclusions because if everyone keeps canceling each other’s opinion out, what are we going to be left with?

9. Media is just trying to trash our brains. I mean I hate how our Pakistani media is promoting so much of filth and confusion.

10. Asking is not always helpful, especially when you can do it yourself.

11. Some things are just fate and need no further explanation.

12. Moisturizers are a necessity in places like Kuwait.

13. Being deprived of privileges makes us stronger emotionally.

14. Your own instincts are your best weapon and your desires are your worst.

15. Regret and guilt are two separate things.

16. And here’s something I haven’t figured out yet. We meet different people in life and a lot of times they try to make us see something we are unable to see. They try to guide us, but it never works and so they leave until this one person comes along who is more convicting and has a better appeal. So this person sows seeds in your heart, and waters them everyday unlike the others that never bothered to water the seeds they were trying to sow, and gradually the seeds grow into a small sapling and keep growing and blossoming with flowers and fruits. But the sad part is that the person that sows them doesn’t always remain. The person leaves when the plant becomes self sustaining, but I hope that person will come back to get the fruits, because who else did the person want the plant for…?
And I’m guessing that’s life. The people who do the most for you get lost somewhere behind after motivating you to go ahead in life…..
Hey you know what? I think I get it. Here’s a picture of life. So this person who sowed the seeds and raised the plant and disappeared somewhere in the midst of it, he urged us forward and ahead in life… and the fruits? We, like the stupid humans we are, will share them with people who least deserve it. Or at least that’s how it usually is. There are people who literally build us and give us strength and teach us to love life and in return we step right over them and share our strength and love with people who didn’t invest as much as an ounce in us. So even though the fruit bearing plant was an investment of someone else’s time and energy, I’m going to be sharing the fruits with someone else?
Gawd, no! I don’t wanna do that. But the person who sowed the seeds and watered them is gone… I’m not saying that the fruits are ready yet, but what when they will be? I hope that person comes to get the fruits….
And even in this confused state, I’m still aware though, about what I said earlier. And I really am guessing that this is what you call life. The best people are always left somewhere behind after teaching you to move ahead.

17. Experiences serve no other purpose than to be learnt from.

18. Pencils and fountain pens are the best.

19. I’m a pathetic writer.

20. Life is exhausting.

21. I’m tired.

Goodbye
– Hiba

I’m bad with titles but you may take this as me trying to tell you that I still exist.

21st December 2014.

I haven’t blogged in quite a while and I’m not really sure if this is me getting back at it or if it’s just a presentation for you to acknowledge my on going existence. Although, I do know for sure that I’m not going to abandon this blog. I’m too proud of it and I’m too attached to this platform where I get to hear out people from all corners of the world and where even my voice can reach out to people in a few corners of this world.

All this while I didn’t blog because I needed a little break because there had been too much going on and it kept me way too occupied. And when I did find time, I would be too exhausted of any creativity or thoughtfulness to be able to write. All I’d be able to say was this: “I go pakistan come back tired miss sad everyone cry exhausted sleep need study exam result life bad”.

Okay, maybe that’s an exaggeration, but better to stay off for the while I’m disoriented, right?

Then the remainder of the while when I did get well enough to be able to get back to blogging, life decided to create other problems and got me too busy, trying to face those. I haven’t been able to properly socialize in quite a while, which is now resulting in the overflow of my emotions that I’m so sluggishly trying to control.

I don’t know where to start or what to talk about, although yes, I do have a little something that I wish to share. Let’s just say that although 2014 brought me a lot of joy and a lot of experiences to learn from and so many good and bad memories, it has overall been a terrible year and I would never want to relive it again. And we all know this. Things had been going all wrong since the very beginning of this year. The missing girls of Africa, the ISIS in Syria and Iraq, the Israeli and Palestinian conflict, the attack in Peshawar, and so much more left that I don’t wish to get into. And then there were also my own personal experiences that have led me to believe that 2014 was an overall bad year.

We’re all wishing for a better 2015 just as we’d wished for a better 2014. But you know where we’re wrong? We’re all just wishing. We’re at the time of the year where people either prepare wish lists for Christmas or a list of resolutions to follow for the next year. And I’ve just now realized that I was quite an idiot to believe that setting up resolutions to follow was pointless. How could it be that? If anything, it’s helpful. It’s way better to trust yourself and set resolutions for you to follow in order to have a better year than to put your trust in a Santa that doesn’t even exist. It’s way more wise to believe that YOU can bring the change than to believe that some non existent organization can.

So this time I’m going to set resolutions that I can follow for a better 2015. I mean you can always try, right?

But I have to say that although I’m classifying 2014 as an overall bad year, it wasn’t entirely bad. There was a lot of good stuff that happened that I wish to cherish. There are also a lot of experiences that cannot be classified as GOOD experiences exactly, but I won’t call them bad either, because in the end I learnt a lot from them. I believe that the only bad experiences are those from which you cease to learn something. And no matter how bad 2014 was, it gave me a lot to learn from and a lot to ponder over for which I’m actually grateful.

And I have to say this. I have missed Lala and Maria THE MOST in the while that I was away. I’m sure that I have a lot to make up for on your blogs for all the posts that I missed. I’m not exactly sure about when I’ll exactly find the time for that, but I do hope that you girls had a great year at least, since I didn’t, and that you have a great time ahead in all the coming years.
Take care 🙂

-Hiba.